Sometimes people can be difficult to deal with. Those who are okay with confrontations yell their way out of arguments, while those who shy away tend to avoid you altogether. So how does one get her way in the say of things, let alone intimidate others?
It’s simple really. Don’t yell, just talk in a deep calm tough voice.
What happened was I was dealing with my 20-month old baby one day and that particular day she chose to be extra extra naughty. Usually I resort to yelling my head off but that day, I tried something different. I spoke to her calmly and got ready to face the onset of a Grade-A category meltdown. But wonder of wonders! my baby started behaving. It was nice.
Fast forward to the long checkout queue at the local Big Bazaar – some guy just jostled me to get his stuff to the cashier just as I had reached the cashier. I usually shy away from confrontations, but it had been a really long queue. So I turned to the intruder and in a deep calm tough voice, I told him to get back while the cashier processes my order. And he did. I couldn’t believe myself.
Now the intruder was behind me in the queue (still hadn’t learnt his lesson!) and the woman who he cut off started screaming at him. Maybe something in him snapped or whatever but he started yelling right back at her, and I was just glad I was out of getting out.
I’ve tested this deep-calm-tough-voice technique many times and it’s always helped me out in sticky situations. The biggest plus point of this is that my baby doesn’t get to see her Mommy in a screaming match with anyone. And I get to be pleasant all the time.
Try it sometime. Remember, deep, calm and tough voice will get you your way with others. Might intimidate others.
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